Reclaiming Your Husbands LoveAuthor: +Freddie Cook
All relationships go through rough times, and when they do, it’s easy to just let things slip. Unless steps are taken early enough, these troubled times can end up months, or sometimes years, long.
When this happens, love seems to leave the marriage and you start feeling like you’re just existing together instead of living life together. This will no doubt have you wanting to know how to get your husband’s love back, you want him to fall in love with you all over again before your relationship ends up in divorce.
You want to ward off the breakup and get things back to the way they used to be. The thing is, your husband may very well feel the same. Both of you have let problems come between you and they are preventing you from communicating effectively with each other. This is a very common scenario in a lot of relationships and not just marriage. Stubbornness and egos can be real stumbling blocks to reconciliation.
If you feel that you’re marriage has lost all it’s love, you should understand that if your husband is there, he probably does still love you. “Falling out of love” is a term that is often applied to a marriage that’s gone stale, but what it frequently means from the man’s point of view is that he has fallen out of love with the way the marriage is going.
Your husband may have pulled away from you because he is not happy but can offer no more detailed explanation for his feelings. Men have a hard time accurately interpreting, and then communicating, what they are feeling. Even if they can’t put words to it, what they are often feeling is the relationship doesn’t make them feel good about themselves anymore.
When you first started your relationship, you were both putting your best foot forward and putting a lot of time and effort into making the other person feel good about you and about themselves. You both worked on your relationship.
So your relationship became stronger and both you and your husband felt wanted, important, interesting and competent, just to name a few. For men, these feelings are what makes him feel like he is loved and in love.
So, it’s important to understand that when your husband says (or you think) he doesn’t love you anymore, that simply might not be true. It’s very likely that he’s actually mourning the loss of the relationship that made him feel so great about himself and about you.
So, now that you know this. . .what can you do? First, you get it all out. Tell your husband that you are feeling a distance in your marriage and you miss the closeness and intimacy that you both once enjoyed. Ask him if he wants to improve your marriage and rekindle what you once had. This could scare him because he thinks it will take a lot of work but don’t worry about that.
The goal here is to communicate your desire to your husband…
Then you show him that he’ll probably like what you have in mind. Define what you miss in your relationship. If that happens to be more affection, then show more real affection to your husband. If you want more appreciation, let him know you appreciate him first. Sure, you have to take the first steps, but in time, you’ll see that he’ll respond.
It’s not unusual in the beginning that your husband will just look at you funny or totally reject your attempts. This will probably be hard on your ego but don’t give up! You’ll see in time that you’ve found the answer to “How to get your husband’s love back?” Concentrate on each other and try and resolve any problems that come between you.
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