Warning Signs of Emotional Affairs

Emotional Affairs And What To Look Out For

Author: +Freddie Cook

couple192x128If you are worried about your spouse and fear that you see some warning signs of an emotional affair then there are a few things that you can be on the lookout for. Just remember that it’s very easy to let your imagination run away with you. You have to be careful to not see things that aren’t really there.

Many of the tips I’m about to give you can be signs of an affair but they can also be innocent and may not mean a thing. Just don’t risk making things worse by assuming something that may not be the case. If something seems wrong don’t accuse your spouse, instead open a dialog with them and ask them about your concerns.

In some ways emotional affairs can be the most damaging. It may actually be a little easier to forgive a physical indiscretion since it often doesn’t mean much at an emotional level, but an emotional connection with another person is particularly upsetting and hard to get over.

Strangely, because there is nothing physically going on, it makes it a so much worse, the emotional connection seems so much stronger because of it.

How are you supposed to compete with that?

Here are a few possible indicators that something is going on:

  1. Your spouse suddenly starts working out or has a sudden interest in wearing new and nicer clothes. This, of course, might be totally innocent but if it seems like it is coming out of the blue than it may be a sign of trouble.

  2. If your spouse seems to be spending a lot more time at work than normal. A lot of sudden overtime may be a sign that something is going on. Is it just an excuse to be near some other person they’ve become emotionally attached to?Keep your eyes open and don’t accuse, but it can’t hurt to talk.

  3. If your spouse suddenly starts talking about a co-worker a lot, especially if there is a lot of admiration or affection in their tone, it may be a sign of an emotional affair.

Sometimes an emotional affair can just sneak up on someone and they are not really aware of it. Even if your spouse is starting to have feelings for someone, they may not realize just what is going on yet; all the more reason to not jump down their throats.

  1. If your spouse is suddenly very private about their phone conversations and computer habits, it is a strong indicator that they are doing something they don’t want you to know about. You need to find out what that “something” is (or who it is).

If this is happening then you can be sure they ARE fully aware of it.

It’s all too easy to slowly have an attraction grow between two people who spend a lot of time together and have a lot in common. That’s why work place affairs happen so often. But before you run off and accuse your spouse of something that you think they have done, you had better be sure or you can really make a mess of your marriage.

Looking for warning signs of an emotional affair? If you are at that point it’s very likely that something has happened to make you suspicious. You know the saying “where there’s smoke there’s fire” so assuming that you aren’t just overly paranoid and jealous, by the time you start to get suspicious it’s likely that there is something happening.

But before you run off and accuse your spouse of something that you think they have done, try talking to them first. Once an accusation is made it is very difficult to take it back and, if you are wrong, it makes you looks very insecure.

So make sure your suspicions are real first, or you run the chance of making a mess of your marriage instead of recovering your relationship.

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Overcome His Affair And Reclaim Your Self-Esteem

Feeling worthless and rejected after his affair?

Author: +Freddie Cook

Save Your MarriageHow do I overcome his affair?

After ten years of marriage how could he cheat on me?

How could he take the chance of losing me… just for an affair?…

Or losing our relationship together after all this time, after all the dreams and plans we’ve made together for our future?…

What about our children and all the shared life, memories and knowledge of each other?…

What did they do together?…

What did they say together?…

Is it just a bad dream or did he really do this awful thing to US?…

… I know it’s hard to take, but yes… I’m afraid he did.

Overcome His Affair

But even worse than all that… one of the biggest, and hardest, things to overcome after you discover the infidelity is how it makes YOU feel as a person.

Somehow, your self-esteem vanishes. You end up feeling, not just angry but, worthless and rejected.

Even though you have done nothing wrong…

Just knowing about the affair and all the lies and cheating that went along with it is enough to make you question yourself.

It’s your husband that has done all the wrong, it’s his adulterous behavior that’s made your past life together almost meaningless.

HE introduced this whole mess into your family.

So why is it YOU that feels so bad?

Why do YOU think so negatively about yourself?

In truth, your lack of confidence and respect for yourself is a very common experience for almost everyone who discovers their partner in life has been cheating on them.

It’s not fair… but, it’s what happens all the same.

And to make matters worse, your self-doubt is not the only negative thoughts you’re having to deal with.

The affair itself, the other person, the details…

It’s only natural to obsess over particular matters concerning the affair.

You have so many questions…

Your feelings are all over the place.

Making decisions, even just day to day ones, are no longer simple and automatic.

Your life has become chaotic and unpredictable.

You need to get that sense of order and predictability back into your life once more.

To feel a real sense of power and control over your world again.

You need to reclaim your life after he cheated on you.

The help you need to survive the affair.

Yes, you can survive the affair, and you have several options open to you.

You can, of course, give up on your relationship. Some will see this as the easy option. Either live separated lives and stay married, or take the choice of divorce and make it final.

However, divorce is never easy, nor is it ever final if your relationship has lasted any length of time. Even when there are no children in the marriage, there are countless other things that tie you together, not least of which are friends and family – a lot of these connections become mutual. There is also a financial connection, don’t underestimate it.

It’s important to point out at this stage that many couples manage to overcome the effects of an affair, avoid divorce and heal their relationship in a lasting way.

In any case, whether or not your instincts, friends, colleagues or family all tell you to kick him out, I’m sure you’d rather find a solution that brings you both closer together again, and lets you get your life back with your relationship intact.

Your next option is marriage counseling. If you can get your husband or partner to agree to this, assuming you can afford this option, and you are both comfortable airing your problems in front of another person, then this is indeed a good option to take.

Marriage counselors are highly trained and effective at helping you work through your differences and bringing you closer together.

However, there is a third option.

One that shows you how to reclaim your life again.

It’s “A Step-by-Step System For Saving Your Relationship After It’s Been Shattered By An Affair,”

It addresses all the problems I spoke of above:

  • Regain your confidence and belief in yourself.
  • See your future in front of you again.
  • Get rid of all the negative thoughts and emotions.
  • No more self-doubt.
  • Banish feeling unworthy, depressed and insecure.

But, that’s just a small part, you will in fact discover all you need to rebuild your relationship and restore the lost trust, love, passion and desire…

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Overcoming An Affair

Can You Get Past The Affair?

Author: +Freddie Cook

It’s true that some affairs simply happen. The cheater wasn’t actively trying to have an affair. Circumstances, availability, a moment of weakness…

But it’s not very common…

Most affairs have some underlying cause within the relationship that contributes to the infidelity.

That’s not an excuse to have an affair, it’s simply real life. We don’t want it to be true, but it generally is.

Relationships are complicated at the best of times, but when life, commitments, responsibilities, hopes and desires get in the way, our relationships often suffer.

There are three seriously big problems happen when cheating in a relationship takes place.

Unless the one having the affair is a serial cheater (which there is just no justifiable reason) then cheating changes that person, forever.

I’m not trying to make you feel sorry for them, I’m just trying to be realistic for the sake of a complete understanding of what normally happens.

Once the infidelity has occurred, it can’t be taken back. It’s done and it can’t be undone.

For evermore the cheater has to live with the fact that they’ve betrayed their spouse. They’ve not only let their partner down, they’ve let themselves down. They’ve changed themselves and they will never be able to change back again.

They feel guilt, not just for the affair, but for the necessary lies and deceit that go along with it.

They have done something that they are ashamed of, even if they felt some justification for the affair, they will still not have any pride in their actions.

The second problem is that the cheated partner is also changed. Once the affair is uncovered, the innocent spouse is left dejected.

They lose confidence in themselves, their partner and their relationship.

They feel betrayed, angry, hurt, lost and rejected by the very person that is supposed to help shield them from such things and comfort them if they do happen.

Who’s to comfort them now?

The person they should be able to rely on has just become entirely unreliable.

They can no longer trust their cheating partner in anything.

They can no longer rely on them for anything.

They very suddenly feel… alone.

The third problem is that the relationship itself has changed. It can never be the same again. It will be different forever.

However, this may… or may not… be a bad thing.

The affair has happened. It has changed the relationship.

If the affair itself can be forgiven and the flaws in the relationship that had any bearing on the infidelity can be uncovered and dealt with, then the change in the relationship can be for the good… The affair can be overcome.

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