The intensity of love within any relationship varies from one day to the next and love within a marriage is no different. However, if the love reaches a low point and nothing happens to bring it up again, then it can begin a downward spiral that can ruin the marriage in the long run.
Asking if you can get your husband to love you again is not an uncommon question. Quite apart from the normal ups and downs of feelings between spouses a lot of other issues can bring about the same effect.
Trying to get your husband to love you again is a tough position to be in. It’s unbearably hard to be in love with someone who doesn’t seem to still be in love with you. This situation is even worse when that person is your spouse, the one person who is supposed to love you unconditionally.
It’s just a sad reality that sometimes couples drift apart. Even though it’s sad, it can also be overcome. It’s easier to overcome if the relationship has just gotten stale than if there has been problems like infidelity or some other really serious issue.
If there has been serious problems like cheating and/or other forms of abuse you might want to reevaluate your desire to get your husband to love you again. If there has been abuse then what the two of you shared, wasn’t really love in the first place.
At that point counseling would be in order. If your husband abused you and you want his love again, there are some very serious issues that you have going on that need to be addressed. Find a good therapist, one that you like and trust, and spend as much time as you need to to figure out why you think so little of yourself that you would want to return to an abusive man and an abusive relationship.
Assuming there were no serious issues in your relationship, one of the first things you can do is to find out whether or not your husband really has fallen out of love with you. You may be surprised to find that he actually does still love you but that those feelings have just gotten pushed aside for one reason or another.
Sometimes it’s just a case where both spouses get so stressed out with day to day life that they forget to ‘be in love’ with each other. The little looks, the small caresses tend to go by the wayside when life gets too overwhelming. It doesn’t matter which spouse stops doing if first, eventually you may both be remiss in your affections to your spouse, and each of you may then conclude that the other doesn’t love them anymore.
Your husband may well be wondering how he can get you to love him again! To find out if this is the problem, and to overcome it if it is, the best thing you can do is to free up some time.
I know, many people would say they just don’t have any free time, but in a lot of cases that’s not entirely true. We tend to feel the need to take care of everyone and sometimes we have to teach ourselves to just walk away.
You may find that in order to free up some time you’ll have to let go of some of the commitments you either volunteer for or just can’t say no to, your marriage is worth it.
Once you’ve found a way to free up some time for yourself, ask your husband to do the same. From that point on the two of you can use this time to reconnect with each other. Get to know each other all over again.
Spend time together, without the kids, and just remind each other of the love and fun times you used to share. In most cases it is all still there and these ‘reconnecting times’ will allow it to begin to flow back.
So, yes, in answer to your question: can I get my husband to love me again, the answer is yes…
How To Save Your Marriage...